Friday, May 20, 2011

Been Busy!

I can't believe that I haven't posted anything on here for over a month! We are all alive, and actually doing well.....just busy! Between school, school functions and programs, Lots of SPORTS, and just living life....I just haven't had the time to blog, or if I had the time, I just didn't feel like it or know how to put my jumbled thoughts into words! I've been thinking a lot about life, and also our prospect of adoption. And, it's been filling my brain to capacity, and making my mind just want to shut down! I feel overwhelmed, but in a good way. I just don't know how to accomplish everything that I want to do, and it frustruates me that time and money regulates my wanting to help a child, that so desperately needs love! It just shouldn't be this complicated!

Gavin has been unbelievably healthy lately.....and I am loving this! I am thanking God for this reprieve, because for awhile, I wondered if he'd ever be healthy again! We decided to take him out of school, and I believe this is how he is finally staying healthy. I am sad that he isn't able to attend school, because I know he benefitted greatly from going, and he enjoyed it too! But, my goals for him have always been, and always will be, to be HAPPY and HEALTHY. So, looking at things in this perspective, our goals for him are being fulfilled!

Today marks Joel's and my 16th wedding anniversary! We have been together for over 19 years, which is half our lives on this earth! It's been a wild ride, but one that has been filled with blessing! Happy Anniversary Joel.....I love you more today than I did 16 years ago, and I thank God for placing you in my life!

The other day I was feeling sad about how the world appears to look at those like Gavin. I was wondering who gets to decide what a person's worth is? Why do people seem to think that you have to be accomplishing so much, to really be worth anything? Having been given the gift of Gavin, I have also been given an open heart and mind, to those similiar to him. On FB, I asked people what their thoughts were on how much worth a person has. To me, God's opinion is far greater than the opinion of humans.....and since He doesn't make mistakes, I know that He finds great worth in those like Gavin. They may not be able to DO a whole lot, but they bring more to "the table" than most people I know. God's purpose for Gavin may seem trivial to many, but I believe His purpose is great!

Here is a comment, and a couple of verses that a friend left for me on FB:

"Having a child with special needs has really opened my eyes to look at the worth of others as God would, not as the world does. Sure, there are days when the world's view still hurts, but that's when I go back to these verses:"

"What people value is highly detestable in God's sight." Luke 16:5b

"For the Lord sees not as man sees, man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." I Samuel 16:7

SO TRUE! I was thankful to have these verses to brighten my mood!

And, here is a story that another friend messaged to me:


A Blue Rose

Having four visiting family members, my wife was very busy, so I offered to go to the store for her to get some needed items, which included light bulbs, paper towels, trash bags, detergent and Clorox. So off I went.

I scurried around the store, gathered up my goodies and headed for the checkout counter, only to be blocked in the narrow aisle by a young man who appeared to be about sixteen-years-old. I wasn't in a hurry, so I patiently waited for the boy to realize that I was there. This was when he waved his hands excitedly in the air and declared in a loud voice, "Mommy, I'm over here."

It was obvious now, he was mentally challenged and also startled as he turned and saw me standing so close to him, waiting to squeeze by. His eyes widened and surprise exploded on his face as I said, "Hey Buddy, what's your name?"

"My name is Denny and I'm shopping with my mother," he responded proudly.

"Wow," I said, "that's a cool name; I wish my name was Denny, but my name is Steve."

"Steve, like Stevarino?" he asked. "Yes," I answered. "How old are you Denny?"

"How old am I now, Mommy?" he asked his mother as she slowly came over from the next aisle.

"You're fifteen-years-old Denny; now be a good boy and let the man pass by."

I acknowledged her and continued to talk to Denny for several more minutes about summer, bicycles and school. I watched his brown eyes dance with excitement, because he was the center of someone's attention. He then abruptly turned and headed toward the toy section.

Denny's mom had a puzzled look on her face and thanked me for taking the time to talk with her son. She told me that most people wouldn't even look at him, much less talk to him.

I told her that it was my pleasure and then I said something I have no idea where it came from, other than by the prompting of the Holy Spirit. I told her that there are plenty of red, yellow, and pink roses in God's Garden; however, "Blue Roses" are very rare and should be appreciated for their beauty and distinctiveness. You see, Denny is a Blue Rose and if someone doesn't stop and smell that rose with their heart and touch that rose with their kindness, then they've missed a blessing from God.

She was silent for a second, then with a tear in her eye she asked, "Who are you?"

Without thinking I said, "Oh, I'm probably just a dandelion, but I sure love living in God's garden."

She reached out, squeezed my hand and said, "God bless you!" and then I had tears in my eyes.

May I suggest, the next time you see a BLUE ROSE, don't turn your head and walk off. Take the time to smile and say Hello. Why? Because, by the grace of GOD, this mother or father could be you. This could be your child, grandchild, niece or nephew. What a difference a moment can mean to that person or their family.

From an old dandelion! Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.


I've read this story before, and it gets me crying everytime I read it!

I'm just so thankful that God chose me to have the opportunity to care for such a rare "Blue Rose." I am so blessed!

"And the desert shall rejoice and blossom as the rose; it shall blossom abundantly and rejoice, even with joy and singing." Isaiah 35:1b-2a


Cari Weymouth said...

Happy Anniversary!!

That story is beautiful.

Lacey said...

Happy Anniversary!! What a great story. My ped was telling me how great my boys are going to be when I told her we wanted to go back to GKTW and volunteer. I told her that just having a special needs sibling changes you, but its what you teach your kids that will make them better people
If I can just figure out how to handle the teen mouth! This is new territory for me!

Team Carter Jay said...

I'm so glad you updated! I've been wondering how you guys were doing. Happy Anniversary!

Anonymous said...

I loved the blue rose story. I hope you don't mind, I'd like to share it oo.

I'm so glad Gavin has been healthy, it sure sounds like pulling him out of school helped!

I love reading your blog and hearing how you guys are doing. I do read it all of the time.

Cindy Lichtenberg

Debbie said...

sounds like a really smart move keeping him home...those classrooms are "germy" and he will thrive if he is feeling good!

I will be praying for direction and peace of are an amazing mom and person!

Zoey's mom said...

Have missed you my blogging friend!But you made up for it by posting darling pictures of Gavin.And,I love that shirt everytime I see it and think I really need to get Zoey one.

Hope you had a nice anniversary.Maybe even got out to celebrate,or is that just wishful thinking?Mark and i celebrate 24 next week ... not sure even with all our built in babysitters that we will make it out.No matter,I think we hit our yearly quota already and have been out once since the new year!!!

Love said...

Hi! Loved your post... and i love gavin too:) a lot of us really do.. those who cant the ones we cant love either so i guess its all even in the end.

But the shirt which u have got him... although u may think, it answers other from Gavins behalf... its really u talking not Gavin...Gavin wudnt answer that way when he sees someone watching him... he wud simply say Hi! Nice to meet you:) Cuz wat the shirt really says to me is dont look at me... i am only a bunch of one extra chormosome... thats underestimation of one shud say "do look at me... i am much more then wat u see theres a lot more of me which is within me... and u will need to look a little closer to see it:) or something on those lines...

Dont ever let ur own low self esteem or negative thought come in way of ur or Gavins life... every negative thought that we have has a potential to harm us and our loved ones, and in Gavins case we cannot afford a single more...:)

To doubt that he will ever get better takes out even that one hope which might have let the impossible happen... so no matter how hard it gets... dont let the doubt ruin ur already built bases of hope before it cud turn into an unbreakable fort of faith . dont hear the doubts when u want ur faith and hope to come true...

April said...

Oh he is just perfect! Thank you for sharing those beautiful words. (thank you, too, for your sweet words on Caleb's blog.)

Car said... definately are our special "blue rose" and we couldn't love you anymore than we already do for being your sweet, precious, perfect self (Thank you God!!!!)

Jacob, Nolan and Caleb (not to mention my newest gem...or should I say "rose...Tate!) are all perfect in my eyes.

I love you all very much!

Grandma Doty
(Gramma, as I am lovingly referred to by Tate and Amy Sue!)

Juli said...

Hi Alicia. You probably don't remember me, but I ran into your mom the other day. She, my husband (Chris Wiseman) and I worked together at TV8. And I always thought she did such a great job with you girls raising you as a single, working mother. She beamed when she told me what was going on in both you and your sister's life. And what a great blog you have put together. I love the Blue Rose story. I totally agree with the moral of that story. My daughter was born with special needs and it is so true -- my life would have been so incomplete without her in it. Thanks so much for sharing your life and stories. I look forward to checking out many more of your posts.

naundiane said...

Hi Alicia! Thanks so much for sharing the story of the blue rose! It is such a beautiful story....couldn't help but shed a few tears!!

I'm praying for you all about your hopes to adopt. I just recently read about a fundraiser to help families adopt kids with special needs. If I find the name of the organization, I will let you know. Also, I am sure you have a lot of resources for info, but there a lady that I ran into at several DSAWM outings who has adopted 2 girls with down syndrome. You may already know her, but if you would like to contact her, let me know.

Cathy said...

Glad you are back and I am glad I can comment again. I love Gavin's t-shirt. It is too cute. Connie told me what to do and it worked. Like you, I could comment on some but not all. I had a few people email me and tell me they can no longer comment either. Blogger tells them they have to sign up for a blog prior to commenting. Hoping all is fixed. Connie's advice was to sign out each time, not stay signed in all the time. I just love Gavin's smile.