Gavin has made lots of progress in his life, considering all that he has gone through. He has especially made significant progress since he started school this Fall. But........he is three years old and there are so many things that he should be doing at this age, that he is not able to do! I've been thinking about this lately.
Most of the time, I try to focus on what he can do and all that he brings to the lives of those who he is around. But........sometimes I can't help but think of what he should be doing right now!
I really started thinking about all of this after school started this Fall. Gavin really should be home with me all the time, not going to school! We have never sent our boys to school until they are 4 years of age. This kind of hit me hard. It also hit me even harder when Sunday School began at our church this year. Normally, children start going to Sunday School when they turn 3. I'm not even sure if Gavin will EVER attend Sunday School! And, this makes me feel sad.
Gavin should be going outside today to play in the snow with his brothers, since it's ANOTHER snow day! But, instead he will be staying warm inside with me. Gavin should be getting into all of his brother's Legos, but they go untouched on the floor around them. Gavin should be wrestling with his brothers and annoying them, but instead he's the only brother that never has a bad thing to say or do to another brother. (Yes, this is actually a good thing, but it's still difficult to accept.)
Gavin should be eating food with us at each meal, but instead he just joins us at the table and sits with us while all of us are eating. Gavin should be making a mess at the table and I should be telling him to sit still and use his manners, like I have to do with his brothers each and every meal! (Yes, this is also a good thing, but I really wish that he were driving me nuts at the table instead!)
*On a side note:
Most meals around here are anything but peaceful! Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner are usually rushed and the boys are usually being reprimanded for poor manners and acting goofy. Lastnight Joel had a WONDERFUL idea! I had just called them in to eat, from playing outside. And, of course they didn't hear me or decided to just ignore me. So, Joel said, "Why don't Gavin, You and I have a nice peaceful meal tonight and call the boys in after we eat?" I wasn't too sure about this idea, but then I thought about the indigestion that the boys usually give me each Dinner hour and decided to go along with it. Let me tell you, We had such a pleasant meal! :)
Anyway, there are so many other things that Gavin should be doing right now and I really hate that he isn't able to! The good thing is, Gavin doesn't know any better and he is a happy guy whether or not he is is capable of doing all that he should be doing! Plus, he has a way of brightening my day because he is the one person that always has a smile for me and who is always happy to see me!
I don't know what God's plan for Gavin is. But, I do know that, although Gavin can't really do much, he sure does a whole lot just by being him!
"Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; my flesh also shall rest in hope." Psalm 16:9